I speak not to the victims or survivors, but the perps Who perpetrate such violence against those they see as twerps Don’t get a badder attitude, don’t get a bigger bat, Just get better at being a good person, less a brat! It’s not a rite of passage, you don’t have the right to treat A person you don’t like with words of hatred, you don’t beat Another ‘less in self defense. These kids did not attack Your life with their mere presence like you just did with that smack.
Step back, relax, and count to ten If that don’t work, do it again If you can’t love, then disregard Those you don’t like. Simply retard Your temper kid, cause fighting’s not The way to get ahead. You got?
I speak up and I protest against violence and hate I speak to you with love, while your behavior I berate I know you’re not a bad seed, not a punk, but a good kid Who simply doesn’t know how to undo the things you did You can’t redo the past, but you can make the future right By promising each present moment that you’ll only fight Your urges to do harm to anybody. That means you Won’t hurt another or yourself - that’s the right thing to do.
Step back, relax, and count to ten If that don’t work, do it again Don’t raise your fist, but raise your hand In peace and love, you understand? You’ve got to get that fighting’s not The way to get ahead. You got?
I speak to you straight from my heart as I shoot from the hip If you insist on using fists you’re in for quite a trip Eventually you may end up in prison, or much worse When someone you have picked on picks up your sadistic curse And runs with it instead of walking far away from you For fighting fire with fire makes flames we can’t subdue The irony of being killed by one you’ve bullied, dear Will not be lost as easily as your life could be here.
Step back, relax, and count to ten If that don’t work, do it again See, bullies are not strong: they’re weak Get strong by learning how to speak You’ve got to get that fighting’s not The way to get ahead. You got?
John "feels that answers are provided and solutions are working, albiet on their own time frame and from a power greater than I…holding the pencil and paper is a true gift….at times…"
By hook or by crook, my pen and my book or my keyboard and screen, I will roar what I mean as I live and I love and I laugh and unload, my mode of expression, my code of digression, most creative creation is poetry: it comes through me, not to me.
Souls love. That’s what souls do. Egos don’t, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and you’ll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And don’t leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies-it’s all one. It’s one energy. It comes through in individual ways, but it’s one energy. You can call it energy, or you can call it love. I like to look at a tree and see that it’s love. Don’t you?
Which partially contributed to my writing this poem last week for a very special friend:
NYE brought NRE, such energy fulfilled my cup with so much love, I had to place it up above our deeply feeling hearts to see with open eyes and open mind. I find such shifts in consciousness and actions act to slow the speed a fraction of a second so the first can catch their breath. The breadth of love among us four is growing up despite our slowing down the pace – it’s not a race, but it’s a walk I’d like to take with each of you beside me. Inside you see this beating heart may seem to be retreating, yet it’s not in backward motion but emotion moving forward at a speed more like a tortoise than a hare. I’m not afraid to share my fear, scary though this is for all, a free-for-all is scarier – our fears are faced by one and all, both separate and together.
We can weather any storm, love in any fashion or form, without having to conform to codes of conduct which don’t resonate with our vibration of elation. Such creationships like ours aren’t developed in hours or labs, but in powerful stabs of trial and error, where successes and failures are valued equally as educational and inspirational because confrontational conversation resolves conflict and absolves the guilt we may have built unnecessarily. Primarily, our primaries as well as our secondaries are second-to-none other than ourselves. Those shelves our hearts rest on are not out of reach, and using clear speech we can impeach any breach of the rules we have agreed to. We concede to love, but not to shoving our wills upon another, whether willing or fulfilling another’s will they imagine or know. No go.
So I’m getting off this roller coaster of regretful coasting in g-forces, which forced the issues to the surface, spun us all around in circles, as we screamed our ways through loop-de-loos of lust. This ride’s a bust, but I must, I must, I must increase my trust in myself, and my partner, my new lover and his wife – for life and love are hanging in the balance. This amusement park has many rides, each moves at different speeds, and it’s the bumper cars I’m trying next. Complex issues will perplex us all, and all will talk amongst ourselves until communication has been simplified and ratified our gratitude, agreements, and achievements. Yes, we’ll bump along and stumble, we may even sometimes crash, but we resolve not to cash in on our missteps and mistakes.
Commonly mistaken for fools prone to failure, such missteps are stepping stones on the pathway to success. Now back to the concept of excess: I’ve learned that a little restraint yields a lot of rewards, and awards must go to all of us for trekking this trail together despite the pot holes. Love is not a goal to be reached, but a journey to enjoy, so in joyousness and bliss, I offer you a kiss, and hope to be accepted in your life, to walk along beside you with the blessings of my partner and your wife. While folding hands and holding hearts, emboldened off the charts, our actions speak softly as hearts beat words loudly, the volume and tone will be equalized soon. In the meantime let’s dance to the beat of the drums in our circle, humming our song ‘til the lyrics are learned.
We’ve discerned the decision to bind or to break, is one that only we can make. It cannot be made by another, but just by each other, and so my dear lover, this truth I uncover – for now we must part while knowing our hearts will continue to beat in the heat of our passion, while physical action will cease to sing out. A chorus will croon, conversations will soon reveal the reactions, impressions and lessons which are ours to share. I care for you all, and we all care for thee, so with open eyes see open hearts closed to deeds which decrease someone’s comfort, cause discomfort for four. Forever in love we all shall remain, while we minimize pain and maximize gain. Recall this refrain: souls can love all, while egos love one – love’s not black and white, not all or none.
“Souls love. That’s what souls do. Egos don’t, but souls do. Become a soul, look around, and you’ll be amazed-all the beings around you are souls. Be one, see one. When many people have this heart connection, then we will know that we are all one, we human beings all over the planet. We will be one. One love. And don’t leave out the animals, and trees, and clouds, and galaxies-it’s all one. It’s one energy. It comes through in individual ways, but it’s one energy. You can call it energy, or you can call it love. I like to look at a tree and see that it’s love. Don’t you?”—Ram Dass (via mymindcravesnectar)
“Rape isn’t a ‘natural hazard’ like a cliff edge that women must be careful to avoid when drunk - it is a willful act of violence perpetrated by another human being and the responsibility lies with the perpetrator not the victim. Drinking alcohol is not illegal or wrong. Perpetrators are in control of their actions. A woman is never responsible for a man raping her. But society’s morals and logic currently display a yogic ability to bend over backwards to accommodate, accept, and normalize the reality of violence against women. Studies show that people who display high levels of sexism are more likely to accept the idea that women can be to blame when a man rapes them. This propensity to blame victims and often to absolve the perpetrators allows the cultures that breed sexist violence to go unchallenged. Victim-blaming must also end for the real cause of sexist violence—gender inequality—to come into full view.”—Kat Banyard, The Equality Illusion (2010)
Much of what I read in this blog (http://blog.heyfoxy.com/posts/sexual-jealousy) really resonates with me. In fact, there are multiple sentences and, in some cases, even entire paragraphs which I would speak verbatim when describing my stance on jealousy.
The key insight for me was realizing what purpose jealousy serves. The emotion in isolation is perfectly normal, and even healthy when we’re presented with the possibility of losing something that is in short supply. That is the key—loss of something that’s tough to acquire. Should I be jealous of a sideways glance that my partner gives to a guy who’s taller or better looking? Does that represent the real, legitimate possibility of loss?
Jealousy is an emotion, neutral like every other emotion, that can be intellectually processed rationally no matter how much irrational fear it may raise. Embarking on that process alone is an advanced skill most anyone can learn, but for those who haven’t developed that far yet it helps to have a partner with whom you can process that emotion through compassionate conversation.
Now that I’m in a relationship where I don’t have to lie about who I’m sleeping with, I feel even closer to my partner after a night out with someone else.
Being intimate with one person doesn’t make it impossible for me to think about and consider another person’s comfort levelat the same time, because despite their physical absence an emotional presence is felt in my heart and their expressed boundaries are held in my mind.
Open relationships are a lot of work requiring extreme time management and tons of brutally honest communication. It helps to talk to your partner a lot; about your fears, fantasies, confusions and curiosities. Instead of “all talk and no action" the idiom here is "all talk before, during and after action.”