I’ve been looking for love online since the 90’s. Well, I’ve really been looking online for friends, in hopes that some of those friends may eventually turn into love. Cause that’s how I roll. I like to fuck my friends. As long as the friendship is a higher priority than the benefits, nobody gets fucked over while we’re making fucking love. In most cases, if/when the romance dies, the friendship grows even deeper because of the intimate understanding we gain about each other.
Annnyway, I’ve found that many people who send me messages are those to whom I am not the least bit attracted: either physically, intellectually, emotionally and/or spiritually. For me to be attracted to someone, I’ve gotta be drawn to them on at least two levels initially. And for me to fall in love with someone, I’ve gotta grow a connection with them on all four of those levels. That takes time.
I find it rude to ignore messages from the people I’m not attracted to. Ignoring the disgusting, the disrespectful, and the disingenuous is easy and appropriate. Sometimes, I let those people know exactly what about their approach I found so offensive, in hope that they may consider my perspective (though I expect most just delete my message).
Being considerate enough to respond to those unoffensive but otherwise unattractive (to me) people who took the initiative to initiate contact is appreciated most of the time. No matter what the person has written to me, I’ve discovered the best wording of my response is this:
Thanks for the message, but I’m not interested.
Good luck in your search! :D
Notice, that I did not explain the reason for my rejection. The vast majority of people don’t want a reason anyway. There’s no tone of rejection in my “I statement" and a tone of gratefulness shines through. Almost every person to whom I write this, replies with some version of:
Well thank you for your honesty :) And good luck to you in your search too :)